Parents know this nagging routine of "I'll Bet You Can't Make Me Happy." If Tyler keeps the routine going, he can make it work for attention and entertainment. Tyler doesn't have to be happy. He may not even want to be happy if it means giving up all three entertainment options - TV, computer games and quarreling with Mom.

To avoid being Tyler's third entertainment choice, Mom could relent and approve of more couch-potato TV or allow Tyler another useless hour with his computer companion. But when she again calls a halt to his lazy activities, he'll counter with a nagging request for her to supply the alternative.

Mom needs to stick to her honest reason in order to discourage nagging:

Now will Tyler stop nagging? Probably not, but a few encouragements to look around for his own activities will reduce his dependent behavior.

Parents usually recognize this same nagging approach when it prolongs other kinds of arguments:

But the next day the nagging starts all over again:

Jessica thinks Mom may change her mind when new details (weekend vs. school day) are presented. But Mom needs her consistent reasons, not numerous new defenses: "Your father and I (or just 'I' if you're doing this solo) think you shouldn't just hang around the mall. It's a bad habit just made for trouble."

When Jessica doesn't give up right away, Mom might list other arguments to stop the nagging, but usually the best strategy, dull as it may be, is to stick to the main reason.

As with most repeated annoying behaviors, there's a consequence somewhere in the reactions that keeps up the bad habit. It could be a perverse kind of entertainment or perhaps Mom or Dad have developed a reputation for giving in.

When you think a nagging game is starting, maintain a consistent reaction. Varying your defense with new but less crucial reasons will only result in new arguments. Keep the conversation dull and on target to assure your child that you are not wavering and not willing to play a game for his entertainment.