Loose talk about sex seems to get more outrageous every day. Many parents find it unbelievable.

Brandon: "When are you going to come across for me, Judy?"
Judy: "Leave me alone. And don't talk like that, it's disgusting."
Brandon: "All your friends do it."
Judy: "Oh, I don't think so. And how would you know?"

Many girls face this kind of harassment everyday at school. Boys are not immune to it either as girls get bolder. This part of our culture encourages lots of problems - date rape, for example - and puts pressure on teens who see more and more approval of casual sex in movies and on TV. At age 15, one-fourth of the girls and one-third of the boys have had sex; two thirds of both genders have had sex by age 18, according to the Allen Guttmacher Institute.

One girl in four (about 5 million) contracts a sexually transmitted disease each year, and one million girls under 20 become pregnant each year - about 2700 each day. The cost in social services for these girls is about $7 billion each year, says the Urban Institute.

Alcohol creates much of the problem. Sixty percent of women diagnosed with sexually transmitted diseases say they were drunk at the time of the infection, according to a survey by the Advocacy Institute.

The under-20 set spends over $5 billion each year on alcohol, more than on all the soft drinks, milk, coffee and tea put together. College students average $446 each, more than any college library budget, says the National Household Survey on Drug Abuse.

The pressure is often not friendly. More than half of the girls under 15 who had sex were forced into it.

Parents are not always helpful with these problems either. The American Family Research Council surveyed 10,000 families and found that 52 percent of children between 5 and 17 have bedroom TVs and watch more than 7 hours each day on average. In contrast, conversation with parents averages only 38 minutes each day. Who's winning the influence competition here?

What can parents do to help their children and teens be safe and careful in times when sexually transmitted diseases can be deadly and pregnancy can change life courses in a single evening? Should I have said evening? Evidently I shouldn't have since teenage sexual activity, like teenage crime, peaks between 3 and 4 p.m. each day.

A parent can start, first of all, by keeping the high-tech out of the bedroom. TVs and computers should be out where the family can see what programs are being used or watched. Secondly, parents can review arrangements for supervision for after-school activities. And then, they should reserve time everyday for just family talk.

Parents can also take advantage of the many resources available. The West Virginia Foundation for Rape Information and Services, Inc, for example, has a help number (1-800-656-HOPE) and very useful brochures such as "The Safe Dating Guide." Every state has numerous resources available through its health departments, through the Commission on the Status of Women, and other organizations.